One Day to Go
In a little less than 24 hours, my life changes. Again.
This time, I'll be driving from Houston to Boyertown, PA, to start a new job. I'm told the boss at the new job doesn't do micromanagement, intimidation or emotional blackmail. I hope this is the truth, since I've had to spend the last 2.5 weeks recovering from the now ex-boss's management style.
On the plus side, a reasonable amount of writing and a LOT of packing got done.
The hard things will be living without my husband for two months, driving 1500 miles on my own, and of course, starting over again. Up until a few hours ago, it didn't seem quite real. Now it does, and I'm scared.
Actually, I'm terrified. I'm about to take yet another step into the Great Unknown, and on current history, those don't work all that well... I seem to last a year then have a breakdown. I'm praying this won't be the case this time. We need to get established, financially.
I need to get control over my demons and subdue them. Permanently. With extreme prejudice. I can't do that if I keep taking these leaps into the Unknown and then curling up with a whimper when they don't work out.
So now I have to believe, with all my soul, that this time will work out, and I will succeed. Because I'm starting to run out of options.
Kate
This time, I'll be driving from Houston to Boyertown, PA, to start a new job. I'm told the boss at the new job doesn't do micromanagement, intimidation or emotional blackmail. I hope this is the truth, since I've had to spend the last 2.5 weeks recovering from the now ex-boss's management style.
On the plus side, a reasonable amount of writing and a LOT of packing got done.
The hard things will be living without my husband for two months, driving 1500 miles on my own, and of course, starting over again. Up until a few hours ago, it didn't seem quite real. Now it does, and I'm scared.
Actually, I'm terrified. I'm about to take yet another step into the Great Unknown, and on current history, those don't work all that well... I seem to last a year then have a breakdown. I'm praying this won't be the case this time. We need to get established, financially.
I need to get control over my demons and subdue them. Permanently. With extreme prejudice. I can't do that if I keep taking these leaps into the Unknown and then curling up with a whimper when they don't work out.
So now I have to believe, with all my soul, that this time will work out, and I will succeed. Because I'm starting to run out of options.
Kate
4 Comments:
If you can move halfway around the world, then part of a continent is nothing ;)
You go, Kate!
Drive safe and be well. :)
Looking at a map, I figure you will probably head East through LA and then northeast... right? If you are squaring the route and end up gong up I-29, you can stay in our guest room for a night... We're right up almost in the very Northwest corner of Missouri just off of I-29.
Have a nice trip and avoid the mountain driving if you can. Yeah, it's pretty, but it can be nerve wracking.
Well, now it's been a few days... hope you're settling in well... and I'm confident that you'll make the best of your new situation. Demons or no, you yet live, and where there's life, there's an opportunity to plot, scheme, and kick something in the teeth.
I've had the opportunity to watch you for several years now- and honestly I think you've come a long way. You're achieving at least some of your goals and making progress towards others.
You've had a lot of successes, and you'll have still more.
And for all its trying, the world ain't been able to kill you yet. And THAT is a trend I expect will continue.
God, Kate, I wish I'd known you had moved, number one -- although I'm _very_ glad you found a better job. I used to worry about the last one.
Did your husband's job in Reading last, or is he out looking again?
(Note that I've read backward.)
I agree with the other folks here, btw. ;-)
And if that's not enough, you're a tough, smart woman, you're my friend, and hopefully this new job will continue to agree with you.
I've been battling major depression and grief, as you know; I haven't been "in the loop" with you or very many other people since Michael's untimely and unexpected death in 9/04. I also haven't wanted to inflict myself on you; you have enough on your plate, you don't need my problems, too.
Send me an e-mail, will you? (I think you still remember the addys? Either one will work.) Let me know how it's all going; I can't seem to access SFF.net's webmail at all anymore, so I'm very glad I was able to find your weblog. :-)
*hugs*
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