Kate's Korner

Progress Report for the week

2006-01-22T20:25:00.000-05:00

Well, the work insanity has been making it difficult to get writing in during the week. Still, some progress has happened despite me spending most of the week head down and tail up then losing large chunks of the weekend to Myst 5

Writing: 2500 words on a new short story, plus another 500-odd words on a novel-in-progress.
Gym: Still need to make the phone call to set it up.
Ad Astra: Registration is sent. I still need to book the hotel room.

I suspect that having characters harass me about not doing enough on their particular work does not count as progress ;)

Kate

Progress report #2

2006-01-15T20:36:00.000-05:00

After a bad week and some, I'm back on the wagon, I hope.

Progress since the last report:

Daily goal - 1800 words, most of them in the last 2 days. Much of last week involved zero writing progress. Also, one short story revised.

Ad Astra - Registration sent in.

Gym - need to phone to make the first appointment.

Unrelated items -

1 new computer.
Much cussing at the old computer and a great deal of time transferring settings and preferences. It's not all there yet, but I have most of what I need. The damage to my fingers from razor sharp expansion slot covers is healing.
One mega time-waster in the form of the 5th Myst game, End of Ages. As a puzzle nut, I'm loving this, but I'm having to ration the time I spend playing it. This game is the reason for the new computer - my old machine simply couldn't handle it.
One new video card (see above).
The discovery, unrelated to all the above, that I'm physically not up to long work days. After about 9 hours, I'm fried. I suspect this is mostly narcolepsy, and I'm hoping that getting fit will improve my stamina.
One work week from hell, with three product releases to test (see above). The biggest problem with these weeks is I don't get a lunch break. I eat on the run, which is one of the reasons I end up fried.

Kate

Progress report

2006-01-05T20:06:00.000-05:00

Yesterday:

Daily goal - nada. Didn't get a chance to take a lunch break, and had my Wednesday evening social group after work.

Gym - got the information I needed from the company, but forgot to bring it home.

Cons - checked out passport/visa requirements for heading to Toronto from the US when one is not a US citizen (I'm a legal resident, resident alien, green card or whatever else you care to call it)

Today:
Daily goal - revised one short story before sending it to a friend for some line editing.

Gym - found out I needed to do some other things before I can call to make the appointment to join. Did these, and need to make sure my employer has done their side before I make the call.

Cons - Printed and filled out Ad Astra registration. Will drop in mail tomorrow.

Not exactly a running start, but not bad either.

Kate

Starting Fresh

2006-01-03T21:08:00.000-05:00

Well, it's a few days into 2006 and I'm trying to get a start on my goals for the year.

Writing wise they are

Submit at least 2 novels
Build up to a minumum of 6 short stories doing the rounds (this will take a while. Moving interstate put a large crimp in submitting and writing shorts)
Daily goal - 500 new words OR 1 short story revision OR 1 novel chapter revision.
Cons - Ad Astra, WFC, and Philcon, possibly one other.

Other goals

Get gym membership and work out at least 3 times a week (with a partly healed broken ankle this could be... interesting)
Start practising trombone again. Scary... Very scary.

I'm not expecting all of these to happen at once. I am planning to start small and try to build habits that will let everything else fall into place. Like, once I've got the gym workout to a habit, tweak my schedule to fit in 1/2 hour a day on the 'bone, thereby traumatizing the cats and scaring the neighbors ;-)

And of course, the daily writing goal starts now. Today. I may not always meet it, but I'm going to try. Most activity other than the daily goal is likely to happen on weekends, since weekdays tend to get completely chewed by the day job.

Progress, in no particular order:-
Words today: 455
Gym: Need to find out how my job's corporate membership with the local gym works and how to use it.
Novel Subs: 1 proposal ready to go. 1 novel waiting for revision.
Short story subs: 2 out. Soon to be one as the Writers of the Future results for last quarter trickle in.
Cons: Need to send Ad Astra registration.

The handful of people who check by here are welcome to nag me if I don't post regular updates ;-)

Kate

A long overdue update

2005-09-25T19:29:00.000-04:00

To the three or four people who actually read this: sorry it's been so long. Life has kind of exploded on me lately, and I haven't updated in far, far too long.

Updates on me, generally -

I'm free of Frankenfoot the removable cast at last. This ends 3 months in casts of one sort or another. My ankle hasn't fully healed, but I'm working on strengthening it, and taking care not to break it again. There's still enough swelling that the only shoes I can wear comfortably are my sneakers, but I can walk to and from work, and I'm finally able to use stairs without a death-grip on the rails.
Our new home is slowly getting more organized. The last box of "things to be unpacked" came down from the attic today. There are a couple of boxes of "things to be stored in the attic" to be taken back up, and some ten boxes (all small) of duplicate, out of date, or just plain bad books that we need to find new homes for. We'll need to locate a good second hand dealer who can handle the possibility of his science fiction and fantasy collection doubling - hubby and I have a LOT of duplicates. The computer room is still not fully unpacked, but our bedroom, the living room, kitchen and back room are all 90% there. This isn't bad, considering that I haven't been able to do stairs until the last few days.
The new job is working out well. I'm loving the work, and I'm loving it here. Right now, the fall colors are starting to show, and the trees are a lovely mix of reds, yellows and greens.
My husband has work as a night shift manager in Reading. He's enjoying the job, and hopes it will become a permanent position. At the moment, it's temporary until the end of November with a chance of permanent after that. The part he likes best is being to walk out the door at the end of his shift, and not have to worry about work until he returns for the next shift. It makes a big - and welcome - change from his last job managing a convenience store.

Writing updates -

Thanks, Dan, for posting the release date for the Valdemar anthology. It's due out on the 6th of December, and you can pre-order it from Amazon.com
Illuminated Manuscripts is now available from Double Dragon Publishing. Buying this ebook not only supports me and two of my friends (Darwin and Sarah) who have stories in it, it supports Zette, the lovely lady in charge of the Dragon's Tooth fantasy imprint.
I'm still collecting rejection slips with semi-monotonous regularity. The number has dropped off somewhat, for the simple reason that a combination of moving 1500 miles and changing focus to a novel has dropped the number of submissions I'm sending out.
The novel in question, Wanderer's Oath, is now about half done. I'm hoping to have it mostly done and have some proposals ready for World Fantasy in November.
World Fantasy Convention - I have sent off my registration and applied for vacation time to allow me to get there and get back. I'm really looking forward to this event - I'll be getting to meet so many friends face to face at last :) I'll probably need another vacation when I get back! I'm planning to drive there and back, meeting friends part-way and carpooling.

It doesn't sound a lot condensed to a "highlights" list like this, but somehow all of the above and the running around that goes with it has consumed my life lately.

Hopefully, I can start organizing things a little better now I'm getting back into the swing of having two usable feet again.

Kate

The move is finally complete (sort of)

2005-08-08T09:11:00.000-04:00

Tom arrived safely at 9-30am yesterday morning, with two miserable,traumatized cats in tow.
Of *course* as an alternative to 90+ and humid, we had 80s and near 100% humidity all day, and no breeze, so everyone was soaked with sweat very quickly. Fortunately, my host, his wife, and several of their friends showed up to help get everything unloaded. That was a huge help - we had the truck emptied by midday, and could start sorting things out.
We now have a living room full of furniture, including the box spring of our bed, which was *not* going up the stairs in any circumstances. Rob and Gary (host and friend) spent a solid half-hour trying to get it into the stairwell, and it was not happening.
The kitchen is more or less functional, with a collection of assortd homeless bits and pieces, and the back room is full of boxes and bits and bobs.
The attic contains a collection of boxes and things that were looked at and designated "deal with later - attic". At least we have ample storage space! There's even unused cupboard space in the kitchen!
Upstairs, we've taken the smaller, front bedroom (among other things, the window AC there actually works), and turned the back bedroom into an office space. It will double as a guest room when we get organized enough to get ourselves some kind of sofa bed for it. It's a nice big room, so a sofa bed won't be a problem. We're also looking at possibly a cheap AC unit for that room.
The attic is storage. Lots of storage. Partly because the old chimney (sealed goodness only knows how long ago and probably not touched since then) has sagging brickwork in the attic, and there could be other problems.
The back room will be my craft stuff, closet space, and kitty korner. Crafts I'm not currently working on will probably join everything in the attic.
The living room will include walls of books (as many as I can cram onto the shelves) and my ornaments. Exactly how we'll use it will depend on how things sort out.
We still need to find or arrange a dresser of some kind (closet space is seriously inadequate - we will almost certainly have the closets in both bedrooms full to busting) and - preferably - a glassed display cabinet for my ornaments and things, especially as some of them can't be dusted. That can wait, at this point.
I'm aching all over and totally exhausted, and so is Tom. We still need to find out if the window ac unit downstairs actually works, and get it into a window if it does.
Oh, and at least one of the cats has overcome her trauma enough to knock on the bedroom door last night to be let in for snuggles, and knock again a few hours later to be let out for potty. Then again to come back in.
She's following us around and keeping an eye on us, while the other one has taken up position on top of the fridge and is watching from there.
Kate

Almost Without a Hitch

2005-06-17T14:32:00.000-04:00

I'm now in Boyertown, PA, and made the trip almost without a hitch.

Of course, me being me, the one problem was a doozy - I broke my ankle shortly before I left, and since I thought I'd only sprained it, drove nearly 1600 miles on a broken ankle.

It went like this...

Thursday afternoon - finish loading the car. Check that I have everything and head back downstairs to the car to head for psych appointment.
Two steps from the bottom, right ankle twists under me. I end up sprawled on the cement, whimpering and a bit shocky. I pull myself together, collect everything that fell out of my handback and haul myself to my feet. Right foot hurts like mad whenever I put weight on it.
Oh, I think, I've twisted it. It should settle down. I've given myself mild twists before and after a bit of rest, they fix themselves. I hobble to the car, and drive to the psych, using left foot to brake since right objects to any kind of twisting.
At psych, discover that I have definitely at least sprained the ankle, which is now badly swollen on the outside. The psych gets me a ziplock back full of icecubes, which I use to ice my ankle.
On my way home, I stop at a CVS to get an ankle brace to help prevent swelling. I phone my husband and ask him to get me a cold pack and some wrappings.
I get home. Husband helps me into ankle brace and other medications, then helps me back to the car. I give him my set of apartment keys, the access card for the security gates, and the parking permit for the prime parking spots.
Driving starts. I stop for dinner at a truck stop near the Kinder, LA exit, refill my ice bag, and take advil. So far so good. I drive a few more hours, stopping near the eastern LA border around 9pm, and hobble to the first motel I find.
Foot is now a study in Bruise, but not too badly swollen. I take more advil and sleep with the foot propped up on a pillow.
Friday AM. I wake up about 5-30 am needing the bathroom. I just barely make it -- getting there takes about ten times as long as I'm used to. I organize self, make a rather careful descent into the bath by sitting on the edge, holding on as I swing the good leg over and easing myself down. Showering is done by leaning back into the shower stream, while the bath continues to fill. This gets me clean, but getting out makes me think I might not want to do this again any time soon.
I hobble to car with overnight bag, then drive around to park as close to restaurant as possible for breakfast. At breakfast, lovely waitress offers to get me what I want from the buffet. I thank her muchly and leave a tip even though this isn't needed.
I hobble to reception and check out, then hobble back through the restaurant to get back to my car. By now, it's just on 8am.
Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, a little bit of Georgia, and Tennessee. I stop several times - gas, bathroom, lunch and bathroom, bathroom, dinner, and finally motel near Tennessee/Virginia border sometime around 9pm Eastern time. Each stop gets a refill of the ziplock bag with a fresh set of ice cubes, and advil is taken regularly.
I peel the support brace off my foot, which is now about double the normal size and a truly spectacular sample of Bruise. I medicate, and again sleep with foot propped up on a pillow.
Saturday. This time, I don't even attempt to bathe. I sponge a bit, dress, and realize there is no way I'm going to get that brace on my foot. I'm starting to think at this point that it might be more than a sprain. I loosen shoe even further, put cold pack on again, and take overnight gear to car before hobbling to breakfast.
Tennessee, Virginia, a teensy bit of West Virginia and a teensier bit of Maryland later, I reach Pennsylvania. Only a couple of hours to go. I'm up to four advil at a time now.
Reach Boyertown intact and weary at about 5-30pm. Haul self out of car and begin long slow hobble to home of friends who are boarding me until I can find a new place for self and hubby.
Friends ease shoe off, take one look at foot, and say "ER". They unload my car for me, then Rob takes me to ER, leaving Heather with their kids.
ER takes one look at foot, and says "Broken". They Xray foot to find out what I broke and mutter astounded things about me driving nearly 1600 miles with broken ankle and walking on said ankle. I'm given a half-cast and orders to take myself to an orthopedic surgeon ASAP. Crutches are issued.
By 9pm, I'm back at "home", and arrangements are made for me to sleep on the sofa. The guest room was set up in the attic, but there is no way I'm going to get up two flights of stairs with a foot I'm not allowed to use at all.
Sunday is spent mostly lying or sitting around, with foot propped up on whatever is available. The sofa has become "mine".
Monday, I go through the rigmarole of finding a local-ish orthopedic surgeon who is in my insurance network. After more fiddling about calling hospital to get XRays released, going to hospital to collect XRays and visiting the ortho, I am the "proud" owner of a bright blue cast from toes to knee. I have strict orders to stay off the foot, and to come back in 2 weeks to be XRayed again to make sure the break is healing cleanly.

Since then, I've started my new job, which I like, and my toes (the only part of my foot that can be seen) have slowly faded from purple/black to a yellowish green with hints of unbruised skin. The swelling has also started going down, as I have more room inside the cast than I had when it went on. I've also gone from Tylenol-3 to normal doses of Advil, 3 times a day. Stairs remain an obstacle, but they are no longer a complete "roadblock". We're considering seeing if the ortho can prescribe me a wheelchair for the time my foot can't be used, simply to make it easier to get around the office - I scoot around in an office chair rather than use the crutches, because it's easier and takes a lot less time and effort.

Apart from that, Mrs Lincoln, everything is fine :)

Kate

One Day to Go

2005-06-08T15:24:00.000-04:00

In a little less than 24 hours, my life changes. Again.

This time, I'll be driving from Houston to Boyertown, PA, to start a new job. I'm told the boss at the new job doesn't do micromanagement, intimidation or emotional blackmail. I hope this is the truth, since I've had to spend the last 2.5 weeks recovering from the now ex-boss's management style.

On the plus side, a reasonable amount of writing and a LOT of packing got done.

The hard things will be living without my husband for two months, driving 1500 miles on my own, and of course, starting over again. Up until a few hours ago, it didn't seem quite real. Now it does, and I'm scared.

Actually, I'm terrified. I'm about to take yet another step into the Great Unknown, and on current history, those don't work all that well... I seem to last a year then have a breakdown. I'm praying this won't be the case this time. We need to get established, financially.

I need to get control over my demons and subdue them. Permanently. With extreme prejudice. I can't do that if I keep taking these leaps into the Unknown and then curling up with a whimper when they don't work out.

So now I have to believe, with all my soul, that this time will work out, and I will succeed. Because I'm starting to run out of options.

Kate

The Politics of Fear and the Perfectionist

2005-06-01T11:31:00.000-04:00

I am a procrastinator.

I am a champion grade procrastinator. Faced with a task, I will find anything - anything - that is more important than that task until I can no longer delay it.

When I sit down to write, I will waste hours on computer games rather than write something.

Why? I finally worked that out last night.

Like many blessed - or cursed - with an intellect that pushes the ability of most tests to measure accurately, I am a perfectionist. Perfectionism can manifest in many often contradictory ways. At their heart is fear: the fear of failure - or more specifically, the fear that the result will not be perfect.

There is the endless revision style, going over and over something to get it perfect. That one, I don't suffer from. I suffer from its near-polar opposite.

If I don't start it, I can't do it wrong. If I don't try, I can't fail. If I put something off until the last possible moment, then throw together something that in some perverse way that matters only to me doesn't matter, then I did not fail to do it correctly.

This, more than any other factor, is what is holding back my writing. Instead of using my limited spare time to write - which is in itself a de-stress activity for me because I involve myself so completely in my worlds - I play games. Endlessly. Mindlessly. Because playing games doesn't matter and I can't fail. But writing has meaning. Writing can be rejected, which is failure.

So, I play a complex series of mind games with my submissions, convincing myself that I'm doing this only because I have no chance of success, and therefore have not failed when the inevitable rejection letter comes back to me. They're only short stories, after all, tossed off in a few days and given a bit of a polish to clean out the worst of their sins. They don't matter.

If I can convince myself of this, I can do them without fear. As soon as they start to matter, I start to procrastinate.

Which is why I have one novel stalled on revision, one that is being written extremely slowly, one stalled at the end of the first chapter, and numerous unbegun novel ideas. By definition, novels require a lot of work, a lot of writing. They matter.

And so I procrastinate, for fear of producing a less than perfect result.

Next step is to discover the cure to this insidious disease - and please, do not mention will power. I survive day to day on a pharmacopea of mind-altering prescription drugs. Unless Will is standing over me, whip in hand, and forcing me to put those words down, will power doesn't stand a chance.

What I need is another mind game that will twist the novels into something that in some strange way doesn't matter, or is allowed to be less perfect. And that is a harder thing to find.

Kate

Changes in the Air

2005-05-18T19:51:00.000-04:00

Well, life goes on, and change comes to all.

In my case, it's coming very soon. I'm looking at being in PA to start a new job in about a month's time.

The reason? The boss. I like what I do. I like the rest of the people I work with. But the boss is, to put it nicely, a twit.

Lately, my antidepressent dosage has tripled, and I've been put on anti anxiety drugs and then had that dosage increased by 250%, just to control the breakdowns. It doesn't hold them completely, but I'm down to minor breakdowns each night instead of half an hour or more or hysterical crying.

The pressure at the back of my head, which seems to be related to this, is often close to intolerable. I find myself wanting to take a drill to my skull to let it out. This is not a good thing, as the actress said to the bishop.

I'm really looking forward to starting somewhere with a management style that does not include "employee harassment".

On the writing front, I'm starting to gather nicer rejections, where they actually tell me they liked the writing, but... I have a novel to revise, a three novel series to outline, write a proposal for, and start, and more novel projects than a dog has fleas. So I'm cutting back the short stories to if an idea hits that seems like fun.

I have a sneaking suspicion it'll happen more often than I intend...

Kate

Lessons Learned

2005-04-29T09:46:00.000-04:00

I had a really interesting weekend, with a trip to Boyertown, PA for a job interview. In the process, I learned a few things...

If you are traveling somewhere unfamiliar and you will have to drive, try to arrange a daylight arrival. Driving unfamiliar roads at night is... interesting.
Mapquest is your friend.
Reading Mapquest directions while you are driving at night is not easy.
Mapquest does not help much when you are diverted off the highway because of an incident you later learn was a fatal accident that closed the entire highway.
PA near Philadelphia does not appear to have discovered the concept of "service roads".
PA near Philadelphia does not appear to have discovered the concept of "detour signs".
Following the line of traffic that has also been diverted only works when the bulk of that traffic is trying to get back on the highway.
The kindly stranger who notices your out-of-state plates and "lost driver" behavior and offers directions back to the highway is indeed a gift from Heaven.
There is no relief greater than arriving at your accommodation after lessons 1 through 8.
After lessons 1 through 8, a mere job interview is a breeze.
The roads that were so unnerving last night are in fact very pretty by daylight.
The drive that was so unnerving last night was in fact very pleasant by daylight.
Philadelphia International Airport was not designed for ease of access. It is very worrying being directed away from the airport by the airport access road.
Every vehicle that uses Philadelphia International Airport roads must drive in loops. This appears to have been designed as an iron-clad Rule.
Do not, under any circumstances, wear a silver hairclip when going through airport security.
The current scanning wands can and do pick up bra underwire. And watches. And...
After all the above, being delayed by 1/2 hour at Houston is nothing.
Cats sulk. They won't let you out of their sight, but they refuse all attempts at snuggles.

The interview itself went fairly well. I'm now waiting to hear the result.

Kate

Good News

2005-04-21T22:26:00.000-04:00

I've made my first professional sale :-D

Naturally, I'm completely over the moon about it. The story, "A Change of Heart", will be in the Valdemar anthology coming out from DAW sometime in the future. It's a collaboration between me and my friend and mentor Sarah Hoyt

We were talking about short story ideas for the anthology, and I mentioned this one. She was so taken with the idea and the characters (both of whom have decided to harass us both in the hope of getting their very own novel. Honestly! Ungrateful beggars) that she invited me to collaborate with her. Permission was granted from On High, and the story went in on Tuesday. Today, we heard it was accepted.

I'm still floating :)

Kate

Perfect Record Continues Unbroken

2005-04-13T12:22:00.000-04:00

Another form reject from F&SF, coupled with Analog's insulting form reject for a different story. I'm not going to bitch about the situation with the magazines, since I've already said plenty about that in the last post ;)

It's about time for an update on my current projects, so here goes.

Novels.

New Camelot - 100500 word novel, being vetted by readers to see what it still needs after the last heavy edit/revision cycle. Set in a near future alternate world where King Arthur & co. were returned in 1940 after the bombing of Buckingham Palace killed the English royal family.
Spellweaver 1 - Darwin and I are working together with this one. Our aim is to have it ready for submission by October. Urban fantasy meets quantum physics and havoc ensues.
Spellweaver 2 - I'm three chapters into the first draft, making good progress. Darwin's commenting as it goes, and when I'm through the draft, he'll take his pass at it to flesh out my normally rather spare style and add the technical doo-hickery he does so well. In this one, hundreds of years of more or less stable obscurity for mages are about to get blown to pieces.
Technomage Unleashed - sucky title for an interesting novel that is promising to turn into an epic. I may even commit a trilogy here. The champion of a dark Goddess and a technomage newly come into her gifts may be all that stand to prevent the destruction of their society.
Daughter of the Dream - outlined novel, again with the strong possibility of committing trilogy. Australian style Dreamtime magic meets murder, mayhem and politics in a fantasy ancient Australian setting.
Plague of Roaches - outlined novel, also with the possibility of committing trilogy. Science Fiction with a weird mix of space opera and mil SF. A distant human world gets used by cockroach-like aliens, and finds itself in the middle of a war against the Roaches' sworn enemies.

Short Stories

So far, 13 in submission. Anything that gets rejected gets sent to someone else as soon as I have time to do it (usually the weekends)
I'm in a short story a week challenge. So far, I haven't missed once. I've done a variety of styles, from fantasy/sf blends, humor, SF, fantasy, fairy-tales... It's a learning experience, and a lot of fun.
I'm also trying to average 1 new submission a week, which is starting to get interesting as I run out of major markets. I'm well into the second string markets (the ones that pay less than pro rate, but not an absolute pittance), and doing my best to make myself ineligible for the Writers of the Future competition.
I have a few series of shorts that are proving difficult to place: the orcs (no-one seems to want crass, belching, flatulent orcs who save the world with their malodorous gaseous emissions), the spacefaring vamps (SF/Fantasy blend. Not easy to place). I may end up with a third series about AIs who think with music and their engineers who need to be musicians as well as technicians. We'll see.

That about sums it up. Not overcommitted, am I?

Kate

Progress

2005-04-02T16:40:00.000-05:00

Well, as of this week I have a perfect record with Fantasy & Science Fiction Magazine. Three submissions for three form rejections. We'll see if the next one maintains the record ;)

I find myself taking a warped amusement in the growing collection of form rejections. They say nothing about the quality of my writing, and everything about what is wrong with SFF short fiction publishing today.

Take a look in your local Barnes & Noble, or Borders, or... Where do the SFF readers go? Straight to their little ghetto of the bookstore.

Now look for the SFF magazines. You won't find them anywhere near the genre ghettos. They live over in the magazine stands, buried somewhere in the hobbies or literature section - if they're there at all.

Now have a look at them. One shining example of all that is wrong with genre magazines is Realms of Fantasy. I've never seen an issue that didn't have a cover absolutely screaming "Dungeons and Dragons gamer heaven in these pages". Take a look inside and what do you see? More space given to ads than to the stories. And the stories are, for want of a better word, "literary" in the worst sense.

And they wonder why sales are falling.

I cannot remember the last time I saw a short story in any of the major SFF magazines that I actually enjoyed. There seems to be this idea that a well told, fast moving plot with characters people can identify with is somehow sub-standard.

Well, sorry, but that's what most people want to read. I've never met anyone who reads SFF for the literary value. Heck, I've never met anyone who reads for the literary value. People read because they want to be entertained. They want a few hours outside their regular routine where interesting things happen and the choices and individual makes can matter to the world at large. Or they want something that makes them laugh.

I'm a reader. I have a relatively small collection, for a genre reader - about 1000 books. I'm one of the thousands paying for editorial salaries.

And I say to the editors of the SFF major magazines, get a clue, people. I am not going to buy your magazines if you publish maybe one story a year that doesn't make me want to barf. I want stories. I want people I can care about, in worlds that I'd like to visit. I want to see your offerings when I go to the bookstore, not have to find them hiding in the depths like the unwanted relative at a wedding. And I am not alone. There are thousands of people like me.

Until you get it right, we won't be buying your magazines. If you never get it right, no-one will buy your magazines except people wanting to be published in them. And that, dear editors, is nothing more than an entirely too public form of mutual masturbation.

Kate

Fury

2005-03-29T09:17:00.000-05:00

I am angry.

Actually, angry doesn't begin to cover it. I'm furious. Enraged. Spitting chips.

I am sick to death of an employer who tells me something must be done, then begrudges every moment I spend doing it. The attitude seems to be that if it can't be billed to a client, it isn't worth doing. Never mind that we have an infrastructure that isn't so much crumbling as crumbled, and that we're shipping way too many bugs to clients.

I am sick to death of being treated like a recalcitrant child whenever my priorities don't match the ever-shifting priorities of On High. Forgive me, but I am not the only human who has never managed to pass telepathy 101.

So, now that I've had my little rant, on with the show. My friend and pro writer Sarah Hoyt has restarted her blog and is updating her website again. Go read it - and enjoy her snippets. She's good.

Kate

An Achievement

2005-03-27T19:38:00.000-05:00

Today, for the first time, I have 10 stories out at various markets. It's a strange feeling. I'm really, seriously pursuing my dream. I've managed - despite 50+ hour work weeks - to write a story a week for several weeks straight. I'm making progress (albeit slow) on two of five novel projects. All I need now is to actually sell something ;)

On the work front, life is hectic. A friend's analogy of a juggler with a limit of five balls trying to handle seven balls plus two knives and a running chainsaw comes to mind. Take this last week (PLEASE! Take it!)

I implemented a major upgrade to our company's work tracking tool. Naturally, it had problems. Most were the kind of problems that come when you try to migrate 10GB of data on a server that has less than 1GB free. Lots of data entry for me...

Then there were the unforseen hiccups - I used my login to the tool to test that the upgrade worked. I discovered later that mine was one of the handful of records that had migrated correctly. Lots of data massage.

Eventually got that all sorted out, and got to try to fix some other issues that had been put on hold due to lack of time, including detailed time estimates for new work for a client.

Some of next week's fun things include:

Long email to the boss, with numbers, about how much just one license of the testing software I've been trialing will save the company. Will need to include ways it can integrate with the internal tool he wants to develop, but be in production much faster than said internal tool.
Testing software on the client's staging server, to make sure everything is working correctly.
Testing other software, and trying to keep ahead of the developers working on said software.

This job is a lot of things, but it's certainly never boring! And boy, have I ever learned a lot since I started there.

Kate

Life rolls on

2005-03-19T21:18:00.000-05:00

And on. And on.

I'm frantically busy with my job (busy enough that after working 52 hours this week, I'm doing *more* work remotely as I type. Currently am waiting for a major file move operation to complete, so I can clear space on an overloaded server so I can migrate about 15 GB of data to an upgraded database.

In between all of this, I'm trying to write a short story each week, and send at least one short story per week to a publisher.

I currently have 7 shorts in circulation, with about 5 more that are fit to send out. This is the most I've ever had out at any one time.

If that isn't enough to do, I've started revising New Camelot, I'm working on the second of a series of three collaborative novels, and I've got the beginning of yet another novel waiting for me to somehow snatch some time for it.

I've got no sense of proportion...

Kate

Getting back into things

2005-03-06T14:43:00.000-05:00

Well.

It's been way too long since I did this. Blame life. It jumped up and bit me again.

On the plus side, I'm writing again, despite not having any time to do anything. I just love my job... I'm the QA person for a small software development company. Said company has some fundamental issues with quality control and work flow. I'm trying to improve things, but... The 50 hour weeks and constant crisis management are wearing thin.

Writing wise, I'm in a story-a-week challenge, where the idea is to write one short story per week. It doesn't have to be good. It just has to be finished. I'm also making bits of progress on two novels. So, writing is good. I'm even submitting what I write.

Today marks a new record for me, with all of three short stories out. Sad. ain't it? I figure if I can send out a story a week as well as write one a week, I'll be doing okay. I can see my spreadsheet of stories out getting very complicated, since sooner or later I'm going to need to track what I've sent to which market and not repeat myself.

Oh, and I'm 'enjoying' one of those truly delightful viruses doing the rounds at the moment. This one features headcold symptoms and joint aches. Bleah.

Kate

One Down, Too Many To Go

2004-11-27T11:08:00.000-05:00

Yes. I finished a story.

The rough draft of a short with the working title Angel/Demon (It sucks. When it comes to sucky titles, I'm in the world class league) came in at around 4000 words, complete. Now I need to revise it and send it in to the December quarter of WotF.

In the meantime I'm working on a short with the working title "Fluffy's Tail". it's supposed to be a fairy table suitable for reading out loud to a child, but it seems to have mutated into a kind of weird adventure which isn't quite childrens, isn't quite YA, and certainly isn't adult. Go me... Not quite 3k words there so far.

On the health front, the new antidepressant seems to be doing good things for me mood and incentive wise. I can't think of any other reason I'd spend yesterday cleaning the entire apartment. Unfortunately, two weeks into it and I still can't sleep without sleeping pills. I'm going to try a half-dose of the sleeping pill tonight and if that works, go with it through the week, and talk to the psych about it when I see him Friday. I'll be talking about it regardless of what happens, but I really do not like being unable to sleep without 'help'. I have enough problems with sleep as it is.

The plus, such as it is, is I'm getting truly bizarre dreams, at least some of which are capable of morphing into story ideas. I now have an outline for a novel (potentially a series) based off one of these dreams.

And I still do avoidance. I'll sit here and do damn near anything but write, all bloody day.

Kate

The Dam Opens

2004-11-10T21:35:00.000-05:00

After a month from Hell, it looks as though the dam has finally broken open. I'm writing again.

So far, I've done 2.5k words on a new story with the working (sucky) title of Angel/Demon, plus about 1.5k words on The Fluffy's Tail, a fairy tale for a project my writing group is putting together in honor of a member's newborn daughter.

Under the circumstances, that's pretty impressive.

Word of advice: do *not* take Trileptal for depression if you are already taking an SSRI antidepressant or you have ever had a head injury or brain inflammation. My psychiatrist (who I will *never* go near again) neglected to tell me this when she trialed me on Trileptal. She waited until *after* I had stopped taking it because I was so dizzy and weak I was walking around with my hands out like a tightrope walker to keep from falling over. The improvement when I stopped was overnight - within 36 hours of my last dose I was back to within 80% of normal *and* the depression lifted.

It's nice to be enjoying life again.

Kate

Time Eating and Blockages

2004-10-24T15:51:00.000-04:00

I've wasted a lot of time lately with a free game, Ahriman's Prophecy (http://www.amaranthia.com/modules/tinycontent/index.php?id=1). It's better than a lot of the paid games I' ve seen and despite a few hiccups plays well and has a lot of interesting puzzles to solve.

On the writing side, I'm still thoroughly blocked, although at least now I have a good notion why.

Depression. Again.

So, it's back on the round of doctors and shrinks, until something gets things stabilized somehow. Lovely...

At the moment, I don't even care that much that I'm not writing anything. I'm more concerned with stopping the disturbing tendnecy to look at the veins in my wrists and see them open and bleeding. I do not want this. I do not want to do this. I'm fighting this with every scrap of strength I can find.

Side note, for the fashion-impaired. Facial piercings and zits don't make a good combination. The result looks more like an oversized zit than a fazhion statement.

And another week goes by

2004-09-13T09:10:00.000-04:00

And again, little or no progress. I'm as nervous as a mouse in a cattery over the impending green card interview, feel like I've got either a mild cold or a reaction to the MMR shot I had to get for the INS medical, and my mind goes blank every time I open any of my writing. This stinks.

And I wonder why I hate myself sometimes? Bleah.

Kate

Finally made some progress

2004-09-06T21:19:00.000-04:00

I ground out all of 600 words. Whoopie...

I'm beginning to suspect that the problems is I don't really have much of an idea of the plot. I have a vague notion of where it's supposed to finish, and not much else.

I think I need to drop a mountain on my protagonist.

Kate

Avoidance Behaviors

2004-09-06T15:19:00.000-04:00

It's now nearly 2-30 on Labor Day, and I'm avoiding writing. So far, I've played computer games until I was about to go around the twist, cleaned the apartment - including scrubbing the shower, not that it makes any difference to the way the thing looks - put on 2 loads of washing... In short, done anything and everything except apply butt to chair and write.

I'm also busy trying to excuse myself by saying that the stress of my impending Green Card interview is doing it. Times like this I hate myself.

Kate

Progress, of a sort

2004-09-01T22:16:00.000-04:00

Yes, I have actually written something. A measly 200 words, but it's still better than nothing.

I pulled out Housewarming, and pushed ahead with it. I really need to apply butt to chair and - most importantly - fingers to keyboard if this one is going to be done in time for WotF. Telling myself "Oh, well, there's always next quarter" just doesn't cut it.

It doesn't help that I'm getting home fried from work - right now there's more work than there are bodies able to do it. I'm already putting in nearly 50 hours a week, and I'm behind. It should - I hope - settle down, but between that and upping my gym commitment from 3 days a week to 6 days a week in the faint hope that more exercise might cause me to actually lose some weight, by the time I get home, all I want to do is bum around and be brain-dead for a couple of hours. Then it's time for bed, because the alarm goes off at 5-30am and another day begins...

Yay me.

Kate

Opening the ledger

2004-09-01T12:37:00.000-04:00

Well, I am officially certifiable, starting a writing-related blog when I'm not even published, my writing output at the moment is minimal at best, and I hardly know anyone who'd want to read what I write anyway.

Never mind. Maybe writing, chatting and occasionally ranting and whining will inspire me to get more actual writing done.

For those who find this by strange and mysterious googling, I write mostly fantasy with occasional excursions into science fiction. Feel free to leave now if this isn't your thing.

Current WIPs:

Spell Weaver - an urban fantasy collaboration with Darwin Garrison. Going well
Housewarming - science fiction short story which I hope to complete in time for WotF 3rd quarter.

Stalled WIPs:

New Camelot - near future urban fantasy/alternate history, stalled in revision after a crash ate 20 chapters worth of revisions.
Technomage - high fantasy, stalled out.

In Submission:

Heirs to the Shattered Realms - fantasy novel, at Baen, will probably be rejected.
Destiny's Choice - fantsy short story, borderline YA, currently at Realms of Fantasy after being a near-miss for an invitation only anthology.

Completed and Homeless:

The Orcs are Revolting - fantasy burlesque short story. Has collected several rejections. For some reason belching, flatulent orcs taking the piss just doesn't appeal to everyone.
The Orc-Full Truth - see above.
Dark Lady - fantasy short story, whimsical humor.

Hopefully I'll be posting progress updates and snippets here. Progress updates would be nice. Words written would be nice.

And now, back to work... The paid version, the one that's eating all my time.

Kate